Name: Katie Bowker
Organisation:
Award Category: Volunteer Of The Year
Sponsored By:
Voting is now closed
My Plea:
Dexter was supposed to be my Rainbow baby. We lost a baby in 2014 twelve weeks into the pregnancy. We conceived for the third time in 2016. Initially I was so scared that the same would happen that I did not want to tell anyone I was pregnant again. I was shocked when I started to feel movements at around the same gestation that I lost our last baby. As time went on I started to relax a little bit. My fears of losing my baby were replaced by fears of the postnatal depression I suffered after our first little boy was born returning after this baby was born. Not once during the last few months of my pregnancy did I ever imagine I would lose Dexter.
I went into labour, 5 days after my due date. I went to the hospital and all was well. As a midwife I am fully aware of all the possible outcomes of a pregnancy and labour. However, like everyone else, you know about it but never think that it will happen to you. Dexter was born after a relatively short labour. When he was born he was pale, floppy and not breathing. The midwife took him off me and tried to resuscitate him. However, after a while of trying the team were unsuccessful.
In time I returned to work. With Dexter always in my mind I wanted to create a place at the Hospital that other parents like me could spend time in. A place we could use to remember our babies. A place that would bring some comfort and support to everyone affected by the loss of their baby.
I emailed the Chief Executive of the Hospital Trust, not really expecting a reply, to ask for permission. He replied and told me that he thought this was an excellent idea. He advised me who to contact to get the ball rolling. This was how the idea started to come to life.
The Garden took around seven months to plan and build. I spent weekends planning then digging the area with help from my family and some of my friends. Along with the help of the local B&Q who donated materials and plants the garden was completed in time for a grand opening that coincided with Baby Loss Awareness Week 2018.
I have been nominated for this award by two people. One is the sister of an angel baby who was born 22 years ago. She wrote:
” Katie is the Mummy of her little Angel baby Dexter and a Midwife at The Royal Oldham Hospital.
This last 12 months Katie has worked tirelessly to develop a baby remembrance garden within the hospital grounds. A quiet, happy place where people can visit to reflect and make memories for their little angels.
As well as leave pots, plants and keepsakes for their babies. This idea was Katie’s own doing and named Dexter’s Garden after her son Dexter.
She has worked on this project alongside her full time job as a midwife; from choosing the plot of land, seeking the go ahead from the Trust leadership team to working in all weathers and on her days off digging and raking. Her hard work paid off and she opened Dexter’s Garden during the 2018 baby remembrance week.
This garden has personally helped myself and my family and is a place we have longed for over the last 22 years. My parents now feel as though they have a happy place to leave mementoes, reflect and share special times with their angel baby Leah.
Thank you Katie for you work and commitment to open Dexter’s garden so families can have a quiet, happy place to reflect. ”
To read how much of difference the garden has made to so many people is incredible. To date the garden has been in use for just under a year. When it was first opened there were just a few mementoes placed in it. Now it is home to around 40. It leaves me truly humbled to know the garden has had such an impact and helped so many other people.
The other nomination is from a close friend:
“Katie and her husband lost their son Dexter when he was born in November 2016. Since then, they have both worked so hard to create Dexter’s Garden at Oldham hospital, a place where families who have lost their babies can come and sit plant flowers, bring memories stones and plaques and at Christmas they could bring a bauble for the Dexter’s Garden Christmas Tree.
Katie, who is a midwife at Oldham hospital, along with her Husband, Adam, have shown such strength in such a difficult time in their life. They are an amazing couple, who have given other families somewhere to remember those lost little ones, whilst dealing with the loss of their little boy, Dexter. ”
The garden has its own Facebook page that people can use to see upcoming events that are happening in the garden. There is also a group that can be used to share stories, talk to others and post pictures of the garden.
My social media presence is relatively small, however I use my page to raise awareness where I can and to support others.
To raise money for the garden I have organized sponsored dog walks. I also took part in this year’s ‘Forget Me Not’ tea party to raise funds for Aching Arms bears. There are also plans in place to use the garden during Baby Loss Awareness week, during which a Petal shower and Annual Wave of Light will take place. I also plan to light the garden with pink and blue lights to help raise awareness.
This garden is the start of my lifetime’s mission to keep Dexter’s memory alive, while also giving others a place to remember their own angel babies.
Amazing lady
Katie is an outstanding lady fully committed in helping others never a thought for herself. Truly most lovely and caring lady
Katie so deserves this to provide support and comfort to others after such a heartbreak shows great strength and courage.
Katie is an amazing mummy, super strong and supportive to others xx
A true inspiration Katie & her family. Her and Adam have done amazing with Dexters garden.
Katie so deserves this she is kind, caring and amazingly strong.
To provide a place of comfort to familys who have been through the unthinkable whilst her own heart breaks is a true sign of strenth and courage xxx
Katie is amazing and I often go to the garden to sit and think about my babies. It’s a calm and peaceful place to sit . Well done Katie and team xx
Katie shows strength and encouragement to others. Katie shows amazing courage in returning to work in the environment that remains a painful reminder in what she has and is still going through
More than a deserved winner
Katie, Adam and Dexter are never far from my thoughts
Deserves this award in my opinion, as Katie is 1 of the most caring ,supportive compassionate member of staff, of which I have the pleasure to work with.
Well deserved for all the time and effort put in to make a place we people can go, and at a sad time Katie thought about other people when she should have been concentrating on herself and family x
Super schievement after such a heartbreaking time.
Katie is amazing and deserves to win.
Katie is amazing in everything she does and definitely deserves to win xx
Katie is an inspiration to other mums of angel babies to assure them that are never alone with their grief
Katie’s strength through all of this has been amazing. We think of Dexter often xx
Katie has been so courageous. Even with her own heart broken she had found the strength to help others and show the power of memories. Memories that will need last forever. To allow parents to be able to visit somewhere where they can find peace with recall their memories and know others who are there understand. Well done Katie(and Adam). God bless angel Dexter.
A fabulous memorial and place of sanctuary for many bereaved families. Well done Katie you are an inspiration to all. Katie thoroughly deserves to receive this award. She continues to support mother’s and families through their pregnancy and birth too and supports the training for student midwives around bereavement too.
What an amazing lady, and an amazing couple, that despite such devastation, and heartache, have managed to create such a beautiful place in memory of their son Dexter, and also for many others who can have a beautiful place to visit and remember their babies, memories that mean so very much, so courageous and strong, truly inspirational Katie.
Katie’s strength and her commitment to help others who have faced the same challenge of losing a loved one is incredible. The garden is beutifully set for peace and tranquillity and a moment to reflect and remember. Katie is truly a deserving winner as she has turned a loss into a way of helping others. We will always remember Dexter with love xx
Please award katie with this award because Katie deserves this award with all she has been through herself having a rainbow baby, also she deserves this award for all her hard work arranging the “Dexters garden” the work that was done to arrange the “Dexters garden” not once but twice due to the first garden having to be moved. I also feel she deserves this award for all she does to support other mums & dad’s that have been in the same situation having a rainbow baby. She also does a lot of things like fund raising for many things like “Dexters garden” & “aching arms”. Katie is a loving, caring & supportive person in all she does. She is a true inspiration to others xxxx
Katie’s strength and her commitment in helping others who have faced similar challenges when losing a loved one is amazing. Dexters garden is peaceful and tranquil giving parents the time and space to remember their much loved lost babies. Katie is truly an inspiration.
Katie’s strength and her commitment helping others who have had similar experiences of losing a beloved baby’ is incredible. Dexter’s garden allows a peaceful timeless place for parents, myself included, to remember their lost babies. Katie is an inspiration.
Katie is an incredible lady, as a colleague and a friend I find her a huge inspiration for what she’s achieved in memory of dexter.
Katie and Adam have shown immense strength to cope with their own loss and grief. To be able to contribute towards others going through similar heartbreak is an inspiration to us all. Her work has been so valuable
Katie is a person I totally admire. The introduction of Dexter’s garden is something that has helped and will help, so many families, it has to be recognised xxx
Such a passionate midwife. A true role model. So committed to whatever she sets her heart to do.
Always an inspiration to me and such a hard job to come back to after what she went through. Deserves a medal!!!
Katie is an amazing person and midwife and such an inspiration to us all xx
There are not enough words to describe the love and devotion Katie and Adam have done to build this heaven on earth for the Angel babies – even going through their own grief of Dexter.
Katie sure is a beautiful soul and such a devotion to honour her beautiful boy Dexter.
I am proud to say I was at the opening of Dexter’s garden and saw first hand all the work that Katie has put into this. She masterminded this, showing such resilience to make the garden perfect for all our angel babies and their families. I know that Dexter and all other babies will never be forgotten, and Dexter’s garden is the perfect place for this. Katie, I admire your strength, dignity and determination in making this happen. Most definitely my winner ??
A wonderful lady. Well done in your achevements Katie. Keep doing what you are doing.
You deserve to win and more. Such a lovely thing to do to honour Dexter and all the angel babies. Xxx
Katie is a beautiful person and an a excellent role model. She has worked tirelessy to raise awareness and support for bereaved families. Her strength and courage is inspirational xxx
Katie is just pure amazing and deserve this for so many reasons.